Essentially

All I can figure, is that:

once I love, it is forever.

My Eyesight is Worsening

Woo....

And I scream to the mountains, and cry in the river. I can't think of any other way to say it.

My heart is a pile of ashes that I've sprinkled too much for others and now I've left myself with nothing.

I wish it was easier, easier than this at least. If I don't make sense then it's probably for the better, because my heart is cold in my hands.

The hard thing about lying is when you can only lie to yourself convincingly.

There are dark stains on this soul of mine that I don't care much for.

Can we trade? No? Too bad, I was going to throw in a pretty bonus with that.

Wouldn't it be nice if I only knew one melody? Then I promise it'd be the only one I sing.

I'd sing it loud for everyone, but I guess you still wouldn't hear me. I'm not sure you ever do.

My father once told me "You're beautiful". I smiled for one and cried for the other.

Amazing, how simple words mean something completely different from different people.

Amazing, how cold I feel when your arms aren't around me.

Analyzing yourself is easier with it on the outside. For me. Possibly for extroverts in general.

I like introverts.

Will I get to hold mine again? I'm waiting for him, but I don't know how long he wants me to... I feel like it's been forever but it probably hasn't. That's what the clock on the wall says, sometimes...

Sometimes I can't see. Sometimes I can't breathe. Physically and metaphysically. Really.

Erin's good to talk to when you need to come back down to earth, or maybe leave it.

Ethan's good to talk to about the things no one else cares about or even thinks about.

Anton's good to talk to if you're contemplating life on a sideways plane and tipsy train.

Chet's good to talk to if you want someone to tell you the truth and fight you back when you need it.

I'm Totally Zen

College. Time of self-growth and learning yourself. Right? I hope so, otherwise I don't know what to do with this new outlook on life. Well, I wouldn't call it new so much as a revelation. I'm more confident that I'll do well in college. :)

However, my beliefs are the same. Perhaps, polished? Yeah. I've had time to really define things that I believe in. While there are things I think sometimes I'll probably always just call myself a Christian. Perhaps evangelical christian, it's true. No one has ever swayed me from believing in the Bible 100% and I don't think they ever will.

So, I sit here thinking. Why is everything changing so drastically? Friendships and circumstances. All being swept up in some kind of tornado of change.

I wish I could take a peek into the future. See where I'll be, know how things are going. That way it wouldn't be such a stressful experience trying to figure out what's going to happen.

Andy confuses me.